Oh the weather outside is frightful,
but the fire is so delightful.
And since we've no place to go
Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.

So far, we have 34 inches of snow. It should stop snowing in the next 5-6 hours. Shopping? Tomorrow? Hmmm...maybe Saturday? I know, many of you would like to say to shop online. That is great, but packages won't be arriving, not even the U.S. mail came yesterday and won't be going out today. I know some parents who are going to be telling their children that Santa just couldn't get through the blizzard. We never did the Santa gig, but at the moment, I'm wondering if I could have gotten some mileage out of that one.

I haven't been off the front porch to get decent photos. The girls did some sledding yesterday. Michael shoveled every few hours so he wouldn't have the full 34 inches to shovel today.


4:00 Yesterday


8:00 This morning

(Edited)
I stepped out my back deck (yes, in my pajamas) to get a couple more photos. I know Christopher is missing the snow and wants to see it since he (hopefully) will fly in on Saturday. (I am so happy he wasn't flying in today or yesterday as the airport is shut and who knows if those people will make another flight.)




This is our covered deck. Because of the strong winds, the snow blew in to the door.


This is our back fence that is 5 feet tall.



I'm not just dreaming of a White Christmas anymore!

Christmas Shopping

I began my Christmas shopping yesterday and found out why it is NOT a good idea to wait so long to start. I thought I would attack it again today-early! I awoke at 6, as usual, then went to wake up my girls for school. When I opened my bedroom door, I could hear chatter. This is very unusual. It is rare that anyone awakens before me. I could see the glow of the television and gleeful sounds filling the room.

"What is going on?"

The girls were dancing around, arms linked. One had the phone to her ear conversing at the same time. Hilary ran up, grabbed me as she sang, "snow day, snow day!"

You've got to be kidding. My kids never get a snow day, well, once every 4 or 5 years. I looked out the window. There was a frosty dusting, but where was this snow that would cause such an interruption to my plans?

The girls assured me that it indeed was true. They showed me on the computer screen and again on the t.v.

Blizzard Warnings. 16-24 inches of snow expected.

Yikes! Doesn't anyone realize the students have final exams today? What about my Christmas shopping?

Looks like a good day to decorate that artificial tree we put together last night. It is our first fake tree ever. Where is the smell of Christmas? The tree is the one scent that lingers, unlike the freshly baked goodies. I love waking up and breathing in the outdoor air of pine. I'd settle for warm cookies today if I had the ingredients to bake them.

Time to reflect on the true meaning of Christmas. Our Savior's birth.


(It's beginning to snow.)

No Tree

Hmmm...I am not sure what we are going to do. We always buy a fresh cut Christmas Tree at the local grocery store. Since we were going to Christopher's graduation and would be out of town, we decided to get it when we returned. We went to purchase our tree and to our wonder and amazement there wasn't one in sight. We just might not have a tree this year. Sigh.

But here is a quick family photo after the graduation. (Of course I will speak more about that later.)

Wordless Wednesday

The Experiment



More Wordless Wednesdays
(Today is the day we leave to attend Christopher's graduation!!!! Won't be back online until Sunday.)

What is it like?

What is it like to have your Christmas shopping finished before December 1st, have your tree and lights glowing, and your entire house adorned with lovely holiday decor? Do you sit by the fireplace at night, sipping hot cider singing carols and enjoying those beautifully decorated cookies? Do you spend afternoons delivering packages and goodies to those less fortunate? Are you all decked out in red sweaters and gold, sharing with friends at Christmas Teas?

Okay, maybe this isn't anyone's life. And truthfully, I have nobody to blame but myself. I am very excited to be getting on the plane with the 6 other members of my family and leaving the chaos behind. The tree won't be up, the shopping won't be finished, err...started, cookies won't be baked. I've more important things to do this week.

Christopher is graduating from COLLEGE on Thursday. I know, it doesn't seem possible. High school graduation was a mere 3 1/2 years ago. But here he is. As always, I have much more to say about this, but am on a pretty tight schedule. So let me just shout:

Congratulations Christopher! I am so proud of you.

The Thinking of a 14 Year Old

Hilary is sick. She's been sick. I've been pumping her full of drugs so she can keep dragging herself off to school and practice. She didn't want to miss the first basketball game tonight. Monday she stayed home. Tuesday she went to school. Wednesday a trip to the doctor. Thursday back to school.

Friday: I wake her up and can tell she's running a fever. It's 102. More medicine and I tell her she is not going to school and we are making another trip to the doctor.

An hour later, she comes upstairs wearing shorts.

"I don't know what to do." She looks like she might fall over any minute.

"What do you mean?" I'm wondering if she's going to ask if she can still go to the basketball game.

"Do I have to stay in bed under the covers?"

"What?"

"I am so hot, I don't think I can stand to lay under the covers anymore."

"Your fever is probably breaking, which makes you sweat and feel hot. Why would you stay under the blankets?"

"Because people say when you have a fever you should sweat it out."

I almost laughed out loud, but instead reassured her that it was ok if she didn't remain bundled in her bed. I have no idea who people are. I wish she'd quit listening to them. Maybe then she'd believe me when I tell her things instead of arguing what these people have told her.

Update: She has pneumonia

Videos

I know, I haven't been around much, but I have a good excuse. My family loves watching home videos. A few years back I began the painful process of transferring them to DVD. This takes a LONG time. (Somewhere in the neighborhood of 4 hours per DVD.) I believe I've completed 6 or 7 DVDs. It isn't a simple one-step process and 1 tape doesn't translate into 1 DVD-usually 2. We have 83 videotapes. I thought I could do this over Christmas break that year. Crazy!

So where am I going with all of this? My darling husband, Michael, decided the other day that HE would take on this monstrous task as a sort of Christmas gift to the family. What a wonderful, thoughtful gift! I forgot that my computer was required to do this. While this process is running, my computer becomes unfunctional for any other purpose. Since my multi-talented, multi-tasking counterpart is still asleep, thought I'd sneak on here and let you all know where I've been. I may not be around as much as I'd like to.

Hey, maybe I will get my Christmas shopping done in a timely fashion this year. Quite possibly those Christmas cards might ship before Christmas, cookies baking in the oven filling the house with delicious scents, decorations aglow...who am I kidding? It just wouldn't feel like Christmas if I didn't run around at the last minute like a crazed woman.

December 1st

How did that happen? Do the days get shorter as we get older? Everyone tells me it is just my imagination, but I think it must be true. I remember being in 1st grade. The school day was at least 10 hours long, no kidding. There is no way it was any shorter. My mom says no, it was only a 6 hour school day. Surely the school had 90 minute hours on their clocks.

I remember after 3 long months of school December would finally arrive. But was it really only 25 days until Christmas? It seemed like an eternity. I'm telling you, the days were twice as long.

December is here again. Yes, Christmas will be here in 25 days. No, that is not 25 long days. Those 25 days are the short ones. They whir past. If I am not careful, I will wake up tomorrow and it will be the 18th. I'll blink and suddenly it's Christmas Eve. How does this happen?

I want to go back to the good old days when time moves a little more slowly. I don't like waiting, but somewhere along the way I missed the average days. I went straight from long, drawn-out days to time warp speed, not-able-to-finish-anything. Trust me, when they say "Christmas is just around the corner," believe it. I just hope when I'm out shopping this afternoon I don't accidently run into it. I can't have time going any faster.

Quiz

I saw this quiz over at Rocks In My Dryer I realize I scored 100%, but that in no way reflects the grammar on this blog. I suppose I should pay closer attention or edit more, but then I'd never post anything.

Your Language Arts Grade: 100%

Way to go! You know not to trust the MS Grammar Check and you know "no" from "know." Now, go forth and spread the good word (or at least, the proper use of apostrophes).

Are You Gooder at Grammar?
Make a Quiz

Cold

It is bitter cold.

Hilary forgot her pom bag, so after school I took it to her. It was interesting to watch the kids leaving the school building. It was 15 degrees outside and snowing. Some students wore coats, hats, and gloves, but they were not the norm. Many wore no coat at all, some came out carrying their coats (mostly girls.) A few guys were wearing short-sleeves, no jacket, and sported shorts. I shook my head wondering what they were thinking. At what point would they feel so cold that they wouldn't keep walking that "cool" walk as if it wasn't below freezing. And then out walks my daughter.

She sauntered out. Was she wearing a jacket? No. Sweater or long sleeves? T-shirt. Her excuse was she didn't want to keep me waiting, so didn't go for her jacket. I offered to get her fastfood as she wouldn't be home until nearly 8 tonight. On the way she tells me this story:

"So I was in choir and we had this sub, and we weren't doing anything, so I asked the teacher if I could go outside and make a snow angel, and she said yes-just hurry. So I did. When I laid down, it was really cold. My arms went numb and when I came in they were all red. My t-shirt got wet. But it was the coolest snow angel I've ever seen."

I shook my head. I am not sure this child is related to me.

(Here is a pic taken on the drive home and one after I arrived home. Wish I'd had one of that "cool" snow angel.)

Wordless Wednesday

A Season For Everything

Only 5 More Times

To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven

Brian will only have to put his father to bed 5 more times. His father has decided to be sedated on Saturday. The sedation will hasten his death and basically put him in a coma. He will remain in bed. No more late nights for Brian to tuck his father in bed again.

A time to kill

This makes me angry. I do not know why this man has chosen to do so. In my finite mind, I believe God gives us only so many days to live out on this earth. In everything there is a purpose...even in those very dark and difficult days where it is nearly impossible to catch one's breath. I think it is selfish and self-centered to try to end one's days before it is time.

And a time to heal


I think about our beloved pets. When one becomes sick, aged or is "suffering" we decide to put it down to bring relief from the pain. But whose pain are we really intending to ease? Is it truly to help the animal, or is it we who cannot endure the pain of watching them? We want to escape the burden of feeling their hurt. We don't want to be sad any longer. We want to move on.

A time to weep

Is this what motivates Brian's father? Is he trying to ease his own suffering, or does it hurt to see his son in agony over his father's condition? If he is sedated, he will no longer have to feel the pain he sees on his son's face. He won't glimpse the tears welling in his eyes. Again, it seems so selfish, a coward's way out.

A time to break down

What if after he is sedated, good news arrives? What if the conception of a new baby is discovered? A time to be born, And a time to laugh The grandfather will miss out, because he has chosen to numb his last hours and days of life-to not live, but to linger.

A time to love

Maybe I am the selfish one, wanting to see this man live through Christmas. I don't want our holidays marred by sadness. Since Elisabeth is dating Brian the grief saturates her life, and flows out to the rest of the family.

A time to mourn

Elisabeth went to class today, but her instructor could tell something was wrong. She questioned her, and by the second asking, Elisabeth was in tears. She shared her pain. The instructor began crying. It was the anniversary of her own mother's death. I think maybe this woman needed someone to share her own pain. She also, having been down this path, had something to give to my daughter. She understood some of what Brian is dealing with. It was a good conversation.

And A time to embrace

God works in mysterious ways. We don't always see how He is putting the pieces together. Others say I can't know what I'd do without living in the situation. But I don't want to be the one who tries to complete the puzzle. I want to wait and let Him work them in and at some point, step to the other side and see the completed work.

A time to keep silence,
And a time to speak

Death is a part of life.

And a time to die

He's Here, He's Gone

I was so excited to have Christopher home for Thanksgiving, you'd think I would have taken at least one photo. But nope! I don't have a single one of Thanksgiving or the other 2 days he was here. I'm not sure what happened to those plans for taking that perfect family photo for Christmas cards. All I can say is, we were too busy just enjoying the moment. Anything else would have required too much thought and effort. Sometimes you just take the down time and make the most of it, and we did.

Wordless Wednesday

For more Wordless Wednesdays, go here.
(I'm not very good at wordless. The story follows.)

Thanksgiving Memories

It was my first attempt to make an entire Thanksgiving meal on my own, and my inlaws were coming to visit. I only had 2 children, but I worried how it would all come together. Preparing for houseguests was stressful enough, but compounded by a toddler that loved making messes coupled with Thanksgiving and all of the trimmings, I felt more than overwhelmed. I wanted so much to provide a comfortable, relaxed home for my inlaws, along with a delicious meal enjoyed in the company of well-behaved grandchildren.

They arrived the day before. I stayed up late that night, after everyone had gone to bed, baking pies. I must have been tired, as I didn't hear my children wake before me. How must that look to the grandparents? A mother who doesn't get up and have breakfast waiting for her children? I dressed quickly and went to the kitchen. There stood my little boy.

"Yum, yum! This is good Mommy."

He was covered in orange and was eating the middle of both pumpkin pies. This was before digital cameras, but I doubt I would have grabbed the camera. I started to cry.

Thankfully, I have the best inlaws in the world and should not have worried. In fact they probably cooked more of the dinner than I did. They were such a help and so encouraging. After that I never felt I needed to impress them. They'd had 5 kids and understood little boys enjoyed eating pumpkin pie. Somehow, when you are a grandparent you don't stress over those things. That is why when 18 years later I awoke to find Mr. Ethan eating the middles of the pumpkin pie, I grabbed my camera. I love being a grandparent!

The Car Story

(Part Two)

After the neighbor confirmed our suspicion that John was indeed spying on and following Elisabeth we weren't sure what to do. Elisabeth tried to reassure us that John wasn't that bad. She said she thought he really cared about her but had some jealousy issues but she could handle it. Because they had so many classes together at school, she felt if they could remain friends at some level the situation would be easier to manage. She spoke with the school counselor.

We didn't hear much about John for awhile, but that was probably due to Elisabeth trying to keep us from worrying. One night she was at a friend's house and John began calling. After 20 or so calls that went unanswered, she turned her phone off. John showed up at the house and said he wouldn't leave until she came out. Her friends convinced him otherwise.

A week later, Elisabeth spent the night with this friend. When she awoke, she found the damage to her car. She phoned us and she phoned a friend at church to say she wasn't going to make it. Within an hour John called. He was at church and had "heard" what happened from Elisabeth's friend. Once again, he seemed to have more information about her car than what she had shared.

After speaking to others, Elisabeth found out that John had been at a party the night before. Mutual friends of theirs admitted John had expressed anger towards Elisabeth at the party. But nothing could be proved or substantiated regarding who damaged the vehicle or at what time John left the party. Others that had been at the party told Elisabeth privately some things, but because they had lied to their own parents about the party and where they'd spent the night, none were willing to come forward with information.

That is pretty much the end of the car story. The car has new tires and a new windshield, but the rest of the damage is still there. I'd like to say that was also the end of the stalking behavior of John, but it wasn't. We were so thankful when after graduation he went to another state to play football. He came home over the summer, which is why we become concerned with circumstances like this. Once the school year began, we relaxed. Elisabeth started back at the local community college. Imagine our shock when after her first day she was walking out of class and John was walking into the same class.

Update

Quick tooth update: Wednesday morning the dentist said he could put another cap on Ethan's little piece of a tooth. The good news, they could do it right then and did NOT have to put him out to accomplish the task. Forty-five minutes later, he came out crying, but his tooth was fine. (They don't let parents, or grandparents back with the children.) I held him for a few minutes and then he was happy.

Once home he acted like nothing ever happened...well, until about 3 hours later. He had a funny look on his face and we noticed that he was missing his new tooth.

On Friday, we will go to the dentist and try again.

The Car Story (part 1)

(Part One)

I was waiting in front of the school when she walked out. Hmmm...was that guy walking with her? Elisabeth opened the car door.

"Mom, can you drive John (not his real name) to the corner of the shopping mall? That is where his grandpa picks him up."

"Sure."

Once inside, Elisabeth introduced us. "This is John. He used to go to our school, but moved away. Now he is back." He was pretty quiet in the car, but then we didn't have very far to drive. After he got out, Elisabeth told me how he and his mother had moved away. She was a single mom and had a boyfriend in another state but it hadn't worked out and John was back. She told me he didn't really have any friends, so she was trying to be nice to him. I was proud of my daughter for reaching out to the new kid. I'd been the new kid at school, so understood how difficult it could be making friends. I hoped it wouldn't be too difficult for him since this was a Christian school.

Over the months, Elisabeth often talked to John on the phone. Because she was a cheerleader and he was a football player I began seeing him often at school events. He and his mom also attended our church. But the more I saw him the more uneasy I felt. There wasn't any one particular thing that stood out as unusual, but there were some little things that I found bothersome. John never seemed to look you7 in the eye when he talked to you. Too often I'd find Elisabeth arguing with someone on the phone. When I'd ask, she was always talking to John.

The following school year Elisabeth ended up with the locker furthest away from classrooms. The school had grown so much, it had begun using what were previously locker room lockers as regular lockers. John offered to let her share his locker and unwisely she agreed.

John asked her to go to the Homecoming Dinner that October and so they went together. Shortly thereafter, although not dating, John began to become very controlling. He would call and harass Elisabeth over who she spent time with, where she'd go and even her phone calls. He figured out her 4 digit password and began retrieving her phone messages. He'd take her phone & read her text messages. She was eating at McDonald's before cheerleading practice one day. He showed up (how did he know she was there?) and began yelling at her because a male classmate was sitting with her.

Michael and I spoke with Elisabeth about how unhealthy this relationship was and that she needed to distance herself from John. She agreed, but found it increasingly more difficult to separate herself from him. Even with not sharing a locker, he still knew her locker combination. They attended the same youth group, she was still a cheerleader and he a football player and they were in many of the same classes at school.

Being a part of the same Christian community, we tried to cut him some slack. But over time, it became apparent that his behavior resembled that of a stalker. Too often he had information about Elisabeth that in order to know certain things meant he was no doubt following her, watching her every move.

One day one of my neighbors came over and asked if I had a minute to talk. She explained that she'd been sitting on her porch one day and saw Elisabeth drive past. Shortly afterwards she saw another car. Instead of driving down the cul-de-sac, it had turned on the street directly in front of her house. After pulling just beyond some bushes, she said she watched as a young man got out of the car. He walked down the street just far enough so that he could see our house from his vantage point without us noticing him. She said he stood there watching for quite some time. She was quite bothered by this, so got up from her chair and began walking towards him. As she got closer, she called out to him. According to her, he turned, saw her coming and ran back to his car, got in and sped off. She described John and his car quite accurately.

(I see I'm going to have to share this story in parts, so "to be continued...")

Interruption

My unforeseen interruption came last night. I was finishing up the dishes when the phone rang. Christina was on her way to class and noticed Ethan's front tooth was missing. Normally this would be one of those memorable firsts that we grab the camera to capture a photo, but not this one. Like his Gramma, Ethan's two front teeth are not quite real. Although his look pearly white, unlike mine did when I was growing up, the backs of them are the unmistakable shiny silver variety-only one was missing. She'd put a call into the dentist and they could get him in first thing this morning. After class they would drive up and stay with us. She wouldn't have the long drive early in the morning. What I'm saying is: I'm going to the dentist with Ethan this morning, the "story" will have to wait.

After the phone call, I double-checked the calendar to make sure it was my night to pick up the girls from Poms. Yes, November 14th was my day. While driving that date stuck in my head and I remembered why. Exactly 5 years earlier on November 14th, Christina came to me to tell me the news. I was going to be a Gramma. It was quite a shock at the time, as it was totally unexpected. I don't have time to share that story either, but will direct you to an earlier post that mentions this time. Oh, and maybe I WILL take pictures of the lost tooth.

(For some reason, I cannot get just that one post to come up in the link. It brings up a whole page-maybe something to do with not switching to Beta yet? The story is "UNEXPECTED" partway down that page.) Nevermind. I will just repost it.

UNEXPECTED

Two days ago, I ran into Barnes & Noble for a last minute gift. I was sending out a Christmas package to my parents and it needed to go out that day in order to make it in time for Christmas. But I can never go into the bookstore without stopping in the children's section, or browsing through the clearance books.

I picked up a copy of Billy Crystal's "I Already Know I Love You." I read a page or two, then flipped a few more pages. Without warning, my eyes began to fill with tears. I blinked to hold them back and felt a stinging sensation. The author described the anticipation of waiting for his grandbaby, how he was looking forward to playing peek-a-boo, taking him to his first ballgame. I turned to the last page.

"I'm going to be your grandpa, and I can hardly wait."



I was not prepared for the intense emotion that welled up from within. I turned the book over. The sticker read $16.95. I can't pay that much for a book right now. But I tucked it under my arm and walked to the counter to pay.

I busied myself with watching the people waiting in line. I chuckled to myself when I saw that there was an employee at the front of the line holding a basket. She was offering chocolate candy for all who'd been standing, waiting to pay for their books. (They apparently agree with me, that chocolate should be used as a stress reliever.) As I passed, I accepted her bit of chocolate.

The day was a bit chilly, so I hurried to the car. All the way I was mentally trying to figure out what else I needed to do after going to the post office. I was a bit undone that I always and consistently leave things to the last minute. But while I was pulling out of the parking lot, tears unexpectedly began blurring my vision. I swiped at my eyes with my leather glove. Not very absorbent.

What is wrong with me? I wondered. I do not cry easily. I've never been an overly emotional person. But here I was, still crying on the way home after picking up a children's book. I normally analyze things like this. I like to know what exactly triggers such a strong emotion. When I am very busy, or under stress, I can't say that I am always in tune with feelings. I like to stuff them until a time arises that I can figure out what and why I am feeling. Then I can deal with it and move on. Right then, I didn't have time.

I pulled off my gloves, grabbed a tissue, and dried my eyes again. I tried to focus on all of the things I needed to do, but I couldn't distract myself. And what was I going to do with this book anyway? I was going to give it to my husband to give to our grandson for Christmas. The image of the two of them on Michael's riding lawn mower settled into my thoughts. I cried harder.

When our daughter announced her pregnancy, it wasn't at the best of times. She had made a stand of purity and chosen not to even date through high school. Here she was, at 20, unmarried, telling us the news.

She had friends who told her it wouldn't be convenient to have a child and that she didn't have to. But like I, she values life. We were going to be grandparents.

When I arrived home, I picked up my bag of books and went inside. I tried to put the book aside, while I packed up the box I needed to ship. But I couldn't operate with tears under the surface, still stinging my eyes. So I got the book to present to Michael. I went to him, but found I couldn't speak. I just stood there, holding this book. I opened my mouth, but the only thing that came out was tears. I waited. This was too hard. I finally blurted out, "I got this book for you to give to Ethan for Christmas. I know it was dumb, but I did." I then retreated to my room to finish the package.

Why am I such a wreck? Because I remember when my daughter was pregnant. I remembered that although we hadn't anticpated being grandparents yet, I often imagined spending time with this new little one. I imagined things like baking cookies together, laughing. I bought lots of books to read to him. I thought of the times I'd answer his questions about why, and tell him about God who created him. But I never imagined that Ethan might not understand these things, nor that there would be so many unknowns. I didn't think that at age 3 I'd still be waiting to hear him say, "gramma."

Michael came in the room. He wrapped his arms around me and I cried into his shoulder. I told him I didn't know what I was thinking when I picked up the book and that I would take it back to the store. He said no. We sat in silence. Once again I dried my tears. "Do you think I should just give it to him, or what?" He asked. "Aren't you afraid he will ruin the book?" I told him it would be ok. He could sit and read the book to Ethan. It didn't matter if Ethan didn't understand a word of it. The words were still true. We DID wait with much anticipation for his arrival. We did and still do look forward to spending time with him, teaching him new things, sharing and experiencing moments together. It is just different than what we'd imagined.

Slashed A Hole

Do you know the song by Carrie Underwood "Before He Cheats?" You know, the girl who also sings Jesus "Take the Wheel?" The chorus of the song is:

And he don't know...

That I dug my key into the side of his pretty little suped up 4 wheel drive,
carved my name into his leather seat...
I took a Louisville slugger to both head lights,
slashed a hole in all 4 tires...

And maybe next time he'll think before he cheats.

Elisabeth hates this song. I don't blame her. Some of you already know the story, but for those who don't, here are the photos of her car.













The pictures don't show the full damage. Yes, all 4 tires were slashed, those "designs" were scraped into the paint on every door, the hood, roof, trunk, and side panels. Every window was scratched, as were both side mirros. Sadly, we'd removed the insurance on the car that would have covered this type of damage. We never dreamed we could have damage so extensive when there had not been an accident.

It has been just over 2 years since this happened. No one has taken responsibility for the damages. "My" version of this story will follow tomorrow, as long as I have no unforeseen interruptions.