With Child

I was reading a new-to-me blog by Ginnie the other day and a familiar one by the Questing Parson. Their memories brought back to life some of my own.

It was nearing Christmas and I was 32 weeks pregnant with my 3rd child. The hustle and bustle of the season was wearing on me. The focus was not on the true meaning of Christmas but the just busyness of a holiday. On that particular morning, I was up extra early. I was determined to have some quiet time before my children awoke. I needed that quiet.

Even though I shivered in the cold morning air, I opened the drapes to the big picture window. As early as it was, it appeared to be light outside. I stood there in amazement. Snow had fallen overnight and the grass and trees were blankets of white. The sun was not up yet, but the snow glistened in the moonlight. It was one of those moments I wanted to share with others but didn't dare move for fear of missing out on it.

After a bit, I cozied myself into an overstuffed chair by the window to spend some of that quiet. I asked the Lord to help me keep the stillness inside so I could reflect on the true meaning of Christmas. I began to think of the birth of Jesus. Was it a cold night when his mother gave birth outdoors in a stable? I wondered at her thoughts about her child as she neared the end of her pregnancy. Being with child myself, I knew the hours spent thinking of this baby. What would she look like, would she be all girl wearing lace socks and frilly dresses or would she be more of a tomboy preferring to stomp in puddles in mud-stained jeans?

How did Mary deal with thoughts of the awesome task before? She was to raise Jesus, the Son of God, God himself. Did she worry about the mistakes she'd make? No parent is perfect. Even if her little boy was without sin, that didn't mean being his parent was easy. She would have sleepless nights, her baby would cry. It was her responsibility to teach him right and wrong, to guide and direct him ultimately train him up and he would be the Savior of the world. I was completely overwhelmed at the thought of what it would be like to be the mother of Jesus. The task was daunting. Just as I was imagining my inability to perform this duty the words of Jesus flooded my mind:

"Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me."

The gravity of it pressed in on me. I could not move, I could hardly breathe. My child, each one of my children, was no less important than Jesus himself. Being a mom and raising my children right was every bit as serious as it was for Mary to parent Jesus. I sat there for a good long while. I was only pregnant with my 3rd. I wasn't even aware that I would be blessed with 2 more precious children. At that moment, 3 was almost terrifying.

But then, just as the snow had blanketed and softened the outdoors, the Lord's presence enveloped me. I knew I was not alone in this task. I was partnered with God. He already knew everything about my unborn child and what she would need for her future. I would surely make mistakes, but by taking the quiet times with Him and silencing the noise around me, He would show me how to be the parent my children needed.