For a couple of weeks, I contemplated what I could do for my sister's birthday. If I lived in the same city it would be easy. We'd go to lunch, I'd bake her a German Chocolate Cake. Laurie loves to shop, so we'd no doubt visit the mall. It would be a grand time. Then I'd watch her boys so she and her hubby could have a night out. So how do I celebrate from another state?

By Monday, I decided I was sending a card. I couldn't actually send it on that day, as her birthday wasn't until Friday. I'd mail it Tuesday and hopefully it would arrive on the proper day and when the confetti fell out of the card it would feel just a tiny festive. (I'm not sure why I couldn't actually BUY the card before Tuesday. I really need to rethink my silliness.)

Sometime on Tuesday I realized I needed to get my act together, if I was going to celebrate in some fashion. That is, until it hit me that it was not Tuesday but Wednesday. Ugh! How did that happen? There was a slim-to-none chance that the card would actually arrive on Friday. I was going to have to order flowers or balloons. But Laurie is a flight attendant and works weekends. By the time she came home the flowers would be wilty and balloons deflated sadly on the ground. Sigh. I didn't do anything.

Friday morning I woke up early. Before I was even out of bed, I remembered it was my little sister's birthday. For just a second I thought about how fun it would have been to just hop on a plane and eat cake and laugh for hours on end. Around 10, I called to wish her a Happy Birthday. I told my sad tale of my pathetic attempts to celebrate and how I wished I could just be with her. I asked her how she planned to enjoy her day. She was having a party that night. Mom was making enchiladas. My other sister, my brother, nieces, nephews and such were coming over. "Why don't you just come down?"

Because she works for the airlines, she can share some of her flight benefits. That is the luxury of flying standby for a very cheap price. She had a pass. The new ones were electronic. The arrangements could be made online. Could I make the 2:57 p.m. flight? Oh my! Michael and I had an errand to run that would take an hour and a half. Yes, I could do it. (Okay, maybe it wasn't really that easy.) I could hear the exuberance in her voice. She began making plans out loud and telling of the fun we'd have. How exciting it would be to share our little secret with everyone when I walked in to the party. She was elated.

I amazed even myself when my bag was packed and we were walking out the door to the airport. I hadn't even told my kids. I text messaged each of them, then texted Christopher. I asked him how he'd like to go to a party with me that night. "What? Are you flying into town???" He was incredulous. I assured him I was and he made plans to meet me there. This birthday celebrations was going to be huge. My mom & dad would be so happy to see me. Could it get any better?

Michael reminded me that although I was looking forward to having a grand time, disguised in my sister's birthday, that it was at a cost. Others would have to sacrifice in order to make this work. He was right. I felt like I was abandoning my other children and him. I was shirking my responsibilities. This was very impractical. But at that moment I didn't want to be practical or responsible. I wanted to be spontaneous, to enjoy the thrill of jetting off to a party. The wind went out of my sails.

I said good-bye, as he got my suitcase out of the car. We embraced and off I went. The security line was long. I felt a bit tense. Maybe when I was on the plane I could feel the party mood again.

At the gate I phoned my sister to let her know I'd be there in just a couple of hours. She chattered enthusiastically. When they began boarding the plane, I told her I needed to hang up. I waited impatiently. I stood near the counter as they called each section to embark. What was taking so long? I didn't have a confirmed seat yet. The announcement came. The plane was full. No one else would be getting on the plane. An earlier flight had been canceled making the rest of the evening an impossibility. Sigh.

I phoned Michael, who was already at home. He drove the half hour back to get me, and it took us over an hour to get home. It wasn't meant to be. I guess it really was a unrealistic & impractical.