Dear Dr. Nocton,
In today's world, I see fewer and fewer men involved in our public school
system. With the vast family structure changes taking place, more than ever, I
believe strong father figures are greatly needed. As an elementary school principal you influenced the lives of thousands of children in a positive way. I doubt you remember me or my children, but I certainly remember you. I wanted to share two specific and significant events that involved you which impacted my life and the lives of 2 of my children.
My first interaction with you was via telephone. phone. I answered your call on a Friday afternoon, in the Fall of 1993. My son was in third grade. You told me there had been an incident at school during recess. My heart began pounding. My immediate response was, "should I come down there?" I worried that my son was sick or injured. Memories of my mother answering a similar call from the school principal flooded my thoughts. I barely had time to put my shoes on before we were out the door. She raced to pick up my brother from Kindergarten. He'd split his head open after a fall. I watched with fear and trembling, as the doctor laid my brother onto a table, under a bright, white light. The sterile office reeked of alcohol and disinfectants. After several shots, the doctors fingers tugged and pulled on a piece of black thread, that stitched Greg's head back together. It's amazing the thoughts that run through your head in a moment of time when your heart is racing.
"No need to come," you assured me. "Your son hit another boy on the playground, giving him a bloody nose. Consequently, Christopher will miss his lunch recess for a week. After he eats, he will come to my office and sit until the bell rings."
I was reeling. I was heartbroken. I never expected a call like this. My son had only been at this school for a year. He was small for his age. My little boy punched someone in the nose? This can't be possible. He must have been bullied by bigger boys. Was it an accident? In my wildest dreams, I could not imagine Christopher hitting anyone, ever. Peer pressure. It had to be peer pressure. My son has always been a team player, yet willing to step up to be someone's hero. I prayed every day that he'd have the heart of David, strong enough to take on Goliath, willing to lead an army to victory, yet humble enough to dance in the streets before the Lord, without feat what others might think. I also prayed he would not be afraid to stand alone, when it meant doing the right thing.
You didn't provide me with details of the incident, instead you continued on as if this was an every day occurrence.
"I must tell you, I spent a good deal of time talking with your son. He is a fine young man. He mentioned that his mother prays for him that if does something wrong he will get caught. I told him God always brings everything into the light. I asked him if he knew that the first words in the bible are, 'and God said let their be light.' He answered me that he thought the bible started with, 'In the Beginning...' I took him for a walk down the hall to the teacher's lounge. I showed him that I keep my bible in there because I can't keep it in my office. I told him that I read it on my lunch hour. We opened it up and sure enough, it says 'In the beginning.' He is a fine young man. He will do just fine. He made a bad decision, but I can tell he has been taught well. He is sorry for his actions, but still has to pay the price."
Thank-you Dr. Nocton, for taking a young boy under your wing and helping him to learn in a fair and just manner that there are consequences to our behavior when we break the rules. That fine young man is now in his second year of law school where he hopes to be a fair representative of justice.
The second incident I wanted to thank-you for involves my fourth child. Sarabeth began Kindergarten at your school. By the third week, she was having night terrors that began her first day of school and she cried every single day I dropped her off and picked her up. Having a summer birthday, she was on the young end and could have waited a year before beginning school. Sarabeth has always had extreme separation anxiety, even as an infant. I was told by most, that I didn't push her hard enough. They said the biggest mistake I could make would be to give in to her, and let her stay home another year. If I pulled her out now, she'd never go back and I'd be fighting a bigger battle the following year. I sought out advice from people I trusted. One of those people was you.
After explaining our situation, you looked puzzled. I expected to hear the same advice I'd heard from others. Instead you said, "In most situations, I would recommend that you keep going with whatever decision you've already made. Your daughter has started Kindergarten, so in general I would say she should keep going. I'm surprised by what I'm about to say, but I'm wondering if maybe you should pull her out. See if the night terrors stop. If they do, maybe it is best that she wait another year. "
This is exactly what we did, and it made a world of difference. Sarabeth was and is an excellent student. She currently attends college with a 4.0. She even spent a semester abroad. I want to thank-you for being the fair and just elementary principal, who conducted his school with honor and integrity, yet wasn't afraid to offer grace and mercy to a little girl who wasn't ready for the rigors of being out in the world. Thank-you for giving her dignity. I wish we had more godly men, such as yourself, in places of influence over our children.
This is another fifty post. Explanation of the series
here.
Truthfully,
Joanne
"Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to sin, it would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were drowned in the depth of the sea" (Mt. 18:6)
