Finding Love In Unusual Places

Last week I shared my "Food Speaks Love" photo. Today my daughter, Christina, sent me this one:


If we open our minds and our hearts, reminders of love are all around us.
I was sifting through my jewelry box today and found a lovely white gold heart with purple stones in it. Michael gave it to me 2 years ago. I put it on, remembering how special I felt when I opened the box.

This afternoon, he noticed me wearing it. Gently, he took it in his hand, lifting it from against my skin. He peered at it closely. He too was reflecting on a tender moment. Still admiring its beauty he queried:

"Where'd you get this?"

What Day Is It?

As little kids do, when I was little, I believed the tallest person must be the oldest. In my family, it was mostly true too. This came to mind when I looked at this photo. (And if I remember, I think I'm wearing heels, as per usual.)

Now I have to show you the photo I cropped my mom, dad, and myself from:


See? I'm the youngest. (My brother isn't in this photo, he's truly the oldest since he is taller than dad.)

Hahahaha.

Ok, this post isn't about all of this nonsense. I pulled this picture because I wanted to wish my dad a very Happy Birthday. Happy 71st Dad!

Thank-you for being the wonderful, caring, praying dad that you are. Thank-you for the love & energy you give to mom, your kids, grandkids, and great-grandkids. Allowing grandkids to live in your house takes a special kind of grandpa. And I know you and mom have not only invested time & money to your family, but you've invested yourselves.

For your birthday, I'm sending you a blessing; blessings of renewed vision & strength to continue in God's plan. From Psalm 71, since this is your 71st:

" O God, You have taught me from my youth;
And to this day I declare Your wondrous works.
Now also when I am old and grayheaded,
O God, do not forsake me,
Until I declare Your strength to this generation,
Your power to everyone who is to come." (Psalm 71:18-19)

And from Proverbs 14, since you were born on the 14th:

"In the fear of the LORD there is strong confidence,
And His children will have a place of refuge.
The fear of the LORD is a fountain of life,
To turn one away from the snares of death.

Happy Birthday Dad, and enjoy your dinner with the rest of the family.

I love you!

Food Speaks Love

Annoyed

Do you ever find yourself annoyed and yet in your heart you know you really have no right to be? But you are still extremely agitated?

That is how I am feeling at the present moment. And I shouldn't. But I am.

Maybe I am just tired. But there you go. Now I am making excuses for why I feel this way. Just stop already!

A week or so ago, I happened upon the 5 minutes for mom blog. More specifically, it was the 5 minutes for special needs. They were holding a giveaway for a program that works with the ITouch. It helps kids communicate with a mere touch of the screen. It speaks for them. Ethan can do this. He LOVES his mom's ITouch and can actually use it with some degree of accuracy.
His favorite thing to do is push buttons and touch things.

Only 7 people entered the giveaway. SEVEN. What are the odds? I knew I had this one. Except, I realized tonight I didn't. Someone else has won it.

Like I said, I'm very annoyed.

Thunk Thursday

Who wouldn't want this hanging on their living room wall?





Life's what?

Guess we know why it was on the clearance rack.

What's In A Smile?

What parent hasn't waited with great anticipation to see their baby's first smile? The delight is immeasurable. Thereafter countless hours are spent coaxing and sweet talking in an attempt to glimpse this tender expression. Each grimace or slight lip curl stirs eager hope. What is it about this tiny grin that elicits such joy?

A smile speaks from the heart.

Have you ever watched a nervous child on stage, scanning the audience for a familiar face? Before the wave or shout, you know when he finds it. His concerned look turns immediately into a radiant smile. His demeanor calms. All is right.

Lovers at an airport, embracing after an absence. The expressions is unmistakable.

Two people, formerly estranged, know right away if the door is open to reconciliation.

A father's genuine smile, as his daughter seems to light up his world.

Approval, acceptance, love, affection, excitement and more, communicated with simply a smile.

Is Silence Truly Golden?

As the television drones in the background, I try to imagine. My mother-in-law is a widow, sitting alone in an empty apartment. She's mentioned a few times how strangely quiet her home is. "It isn't as if he was noisy or busy, but it is still so quiet," she remarks. I stop by often, and it is deafeningly silent.

As I write, I am distracted by a loud commercial. I am used to quiet mornings, not loud chatter and noise. I have a hard time concentrating on what I want to say. And I realize that is the difference. When my mother-in-law, Elizabeth, would get out of bed in the mornings, Ed was already up. The lingering scent of toast & coffee let her know he was there, even before she saw him sitting in his recliner. But it was the sounds & voices, as he watched t.v. that was a constant source of familiarity-the comfort of knowing she wasn't alone.

I am annoyed at the noise resonating in the background, not comforted. Michael isn't usually awake at this hour. If he is, he is working-not watching television. If he was gone, would I still enjoy the silence in the morning? He doesn't drink coffee or eat breakfast, so I imagine that I could pretend he was curled up in bed, still asleep, as I went about my morning. At what point would being alone come settling in? When would the quiet no longer be soothing and instead become my enemy?

To break the silence, I would play music. The sound that soothes my soul. I would know that I am not alone. And I would sing along with the tune:

Because He lives, I can face tomorrow,
Because He lives, all fear is gone;
Because I know He holds the future,
And life is worth the living,
Just because He lives!

How sweet to hold a newborn baby,
And feel the pride and joy he gives;
But greater still the calm assurance:
This child can face uncertain days because He Lives!

Chorus
Because He lives, I can face tomorrow,
Because He lives, all fear is gone;
Because I know He holds the future,
And life is worth the living,
Just because He lives!

And then one day, I'll cross the river,
I'll fight life's final war with pain;
And then, as death gives way to vict'ry,
I'll see the lights of glory and I'll know He lives!

Joy Comes In The Morning

What a blessing when an insurmountable problem looks so much smaller in the morning.


Something delicious.




It's nutritous.




Beautiful instead of creepy




Sustenance instead of barreness

Personal Perspective

Everyone has difficult times. Our struggles can be overwhelming. Possibly, though, we are looking at our situation from a very small perspective. We can't see it as God sees it. Let me show you what I mean.

What are these giant spherical objects pressing so hard against me?



Teetoring on this enormous crevasse where I'm about to fall.



Lost on this dry, barren, moon.



I can't escape this yellow monster. I'm going to drown.

These are objects found in my home today, seen from a magnified perspective. Can you guess what they are? Stay tuned tomorrow for these giants to be revealed.

Monday Morning Musings

Why would a special education director not want what's best for a special needs child and instead, do everything in her power to limit his learning?

Who thinks it is a good idea for a 7 year old child to get on the bus at 7:40 a.m. to attend school from 8:00-11:30 a.m., then take a 30 minute bus ride to another school from noon-3:30 and arriving home around 4:30 p.m.? This would not be an easy transition for a typical 7 year old, why do this to a child who already struggles with disabilities? His mom had no problem driving him back and forth the 30 minutes to a single school. Providing a bus to mulitiple schools is not a better choice.

What does a parent do when threatened, via email (by same director's attorney), to be removed by police escort from school property?...for merely observing her child's classroom when it was previously ok'd by the principal? Apparently it is disruptive to sit in the back of the room and take notes on positive ways to manage her child's transition between the two schools and into this new class.

Trying To Find My Place In This World

I've been perusing food blogs and man, do I feel inadequate. I'm left standing here wanting to grab a bag of flaming hot cheetos and calling it lunch. But I'm also inspired to do more. I can't compare my cooking to that of others. It is futile. Instead, I must do what works for me and my family. Translated to mean, cooking gluten free or according to whatever special dietary needs arrive at my doorstep.

I doubt I'll ever be a world traveler, sampling exotic foods. I won't be going to fancy shmancy restaurants to entice my taste buds with enchanting new delicacies. It isn't happening. So I can't be expected to have a clue about such culinary delights. (Remember that when dining at my home.)

Instead, I will be as creative as I can, providing comforting food to meet nutritional needs-hopefully in a tasty fashion. But more important than the food, I cook for the soul. Food has a way of bringing family and friends together. Good conversation. Laughter, connections, provoking thoughts, curious questions. At the dinner table, we are filled and satisfied in so many ways.

Thunk Thursday

Posted on the door, outside a police interrogation room.

Parenting

I am not a mean mom. Never was. My goal in parenting is to help my children become responsible, successful, loving, respectful adults. In other words, all that God desires for them to be. I've heard people say children should come with a manual as they often have no idea how to be a parent. If done with honor, love, and integrity, I think a parent will get it right.

Some parents pride themselves on being a "mean mom or mean dad." To counteract the permissive parenting of the 80's and not wanting to resort to being a control freak, they have chosen to embrace a manipulation style of raising their children. They see it as a better way than the strict "do-it-or-else" disciplinarian. I think it is one step worse. Mean parents think they are clever, but their methods are cruel.

A friend of mine recently posted a technique she uses in parenting. Tired of reminding her children about forgotten chores, she came up with a solution. Her child heads off to school in the morning and doesn't empty the trash like he knows he's supposed to do. When said child returns home, he finds the contents of the forgotten trash can dumped upon his bed.

Some of you may be laughing right now, thinking this parent is brilliant & saying, "I'll bet the kid won't let that happen again." Is her goal to train up a child to become a responsible adult or is she merely wanting her children to comply to her own wishes and demands? Does she realize what this teaches her child?

She has just taught her child that when someone makes you mad, it is ok to retaliate. When someone doesn't comply with your wishes, it is ok to damage their property. But the loudest message issued is "I don't respect or value you." A parent who disrespects her own children and family members is training them to have little or no regard for others. Basically her actions tell the child he is not valued. Why else would his bed be full of garbage? This parent believes she has one a chore battle when in reality the child has lost his worth. He grows up "doing unto others, the way his parents did unto him," because he has no respect for himself or others.

This training perpetuates the prevalent thought in society: We want our own way regardless of how it affects another person. Instead of responsible adults, we have selfish, self-centered people who believe it is ok to trash others in order have things their own way. Sadly, these parents truly love their children and seem to have no idea why their children become out-of-control, especially as teenagers.

Back In The Saddle, (or attempting to get back)

I amaze myself. But not always in a good way. Has it really been 12 days since I've posted anything? And my recipe blog...1 month??? You'd think I wasn't eating or trying new foods or something. But if that was true, I'd be losing weight. I'm not, thank-you-very-much.

So what is happening here?

I think my brain went on vacation and failed to give me notice. Or maybe hibernating? Last night I attempted to jar it to attention by slamming it into the door jam, while walking in the dark. Ouch! Must have knocked it out of its slumber since I'm here posting today.

Now if I could just do the same with Ethan's school district, since they seem to have completely lost their heads...counting on you God!

Thunk Thursday

Today I deserve a thunk. I accidently deleted my Thunk Thursday Photo. It was a good one too. So instead of Thunk Thursday, today is Thumbs Up Thursday. My thumbs up goes to my dermatologist. This is the story:

When I scheduled Hilary's appointment, as per usual, the receptionist reminded me to come a few minutes early, "as Dr. Ken runs on time." Her appointment was for 11:45a.m. We arrived promptly at 11:38 a.m.

At 11:42, we were called back to the examining room and Dr. Ken walked in at 11:44. He spoke with Hilary for a few minutes and declared her skin as good and no need for anything further. He then turned to me.

"How are you doing? Do you need anything?"

"Well, actually I have this little spot that I need you to check...so I'll make an appointment."

"Do you want me to look at it now?" He didn't need to ask me twice. After looking it over, he asked if I wanted him to freeze it off or go ahead and biopsy it. This spot has been frozen twice, so I told him he could go ahead and biopsy. Within a minute he'd injected lidocaine to numb it, sliced a sliver of skin, cauterized it to minimize bleeding, applied a bandage and I was out the door.

He said he wasn't going to charge me for Hilary's visit since she didn't really need to be seen, but I'd need to stop at the checkout desk to pay my copay. I checked my watch. It was 11:55. A mere 10 minutes after Hilary's scheduled appointment. Why can't all doctors be this efficient?

As I made my payment, I remarked to the girl how much I appreciated being able to get in and out so quickly. She laughed as she printed up my superbill and said, "some people don't like it. They don't feel like they get their money's worth. So we have another doctor who is slower and doesn't run on schedule. It keeps everyone happy."

I think Dr. Ken is the best ever.

Marvelous Monday

Mondays used to be my least favorite day of the entire week. I despised getting up early and sending my kids off into the cold, cruel world. I wanted my children close & content, not controlled and confined in a classroom. But Mondays seem different now. They are marvelous.

Mondays are filled with hope and excitement of all that lies ahead for the new week. Adventure stands at my doorstep.

Today is Tuesday. I sit here wondering why I'm up before the sun? I don't think God intended for us to get up so early. If he had, he would have made the sun rise earlier. He didn't. Winter is for quiet, longer sleeping. He made long, dark hours so I could sleep.

Maybe He meant for me to go to bed earlier too. The sun does set at 5:00p.m.

New Years Resolutions

1. I'm not making any resolutions.
2. If I were to make resolutions they would be the usual:
a) lose weight
b) grow spiritually
c) run with the giants

I was surprised to hear numerous people eager to wish 2009 good-bye. The proverbial "Don't let the door hit you on the way out" was expressed over and over, but in less than gentle tones. Was it the economy? Hard times? Loss? Where is the hope so many had when President Obama and his cronies took over last January?

But then I remember the words in 2 Timothy 3:1-5:

Remember this! In the last days there will be many troubles, because people will love themselves, love money, brag, and be proud. They will say evil things against others and will not obey their parents or be thankful or be the kind of people God wants. They will not love others, will refuse to forgive, will gossip, and will not control themselves. They will be cruel, will hate what is good, will turn against their friends, and will do foolish things without thinking. They will be conceited, will love pleasure instead of God, and will act as if they serve God but will not have his power. Stay away from those people.

So where is the hope for 2010? To begin the New Year, I'm reading through Acts.

"In the last days,’ God says,
‘I will pour out my Spirit upon all people.
Your sons and daughters will prophesy.
Your young men will see visions,
and your old men will dream dreams.
In those days I will pour out my Spirit"
even on my servants—men and women alike—
and they will prophesy.

Saying Good-bye to 2009

Wow, that was scary. I almost titled my post; Saying Good-bye to 2008. I'd even thought of a clever rhyme with eight. But instead of feeling smart, I feel like 2 years just blew past me. I wanted to put together a video slideshow to recap the year, but before I got to March I had way too many photos. So instead, here is my shortened list of highlights instead.

In January, we said good-bye to Sarabeth, as she donned her wings and ventured in to college dorm life.


In February, we said good-bye to Christopher & Lauren, as the newlyweds embraced the challenge of living & teaching English in South Korea.


In March, Hilary and I celebrated her birthday in Arizona. I had a birthday too and learned to Skype.

In April, we said good-bye to wheat gluten, and began the journey of eating gluten-free, as this was the month Elisabeth was diagnosed with Celiac Disease.


In May, Michael and I went on a much welcomed trip to North Carolina. We fell in love with the beach and islands that don't allow cars. I could get used to driving a golf cart to the local cafe for breakfast on the beach. Christopher & Lauren visited China.


In June, I attended the circus with Ethan & Christina. We also had the pleasure of hosting Michael's niece, Rachel for the summer.


July was a month of family time; both here and in Arizona

August ended our summer of late night puzzle building and Hilary began her senior year of high school.

September

October was a month for rewards, travel, and more beach time. Disneyland with my parents, Ethan, Christina, & Elisabeth. Christopher and Lauren celebrated their 1st anniversary abroad.


In November we hosted a surprise 60th anniversary party for Michael's mom and dad.

In December we said our final good-byes to my father-in-law; a wonderful father, grandfather and great grandfather. He is greatly missed.

Explanation

Monday was sort of a weird day. We had a 2:00 p.m. appointment for an informal viewing so my mother-in-law could see her beloved one last time. I wasn't sure what to expect, but he looked very peaceful. Funeral arrangements were finally made and will take place in Arizona a week from today.

I spent several hours searching for flights to accomodate the seven of us and our schedules. And then I made a desperate call to the hairdresser hoping she could find time to squeeze me in before we left. Miraculously, she had an opening late in the day. I knew my family would understand that my hair was more important than having dinner on the table. You all know I am not a nice person when dealing with a bad hair day. (Hanging head in shame.)

I won't go into how my hairdresser has terrible short term memory loss, how she can't remember what I told her I wanted, but can remember what I told her I thought I wanted 3 months ago. But when I went to pay, I realized that my anniversary was the next day. Michael's birthday, the 24th, was sort of postponed until January. I didn't even get him a card. So I wanted to somehow acknowledge him for having spent the last 26+ years with me.

I dragged myself out to the store around 10:30p.m. The 5th card I picked up struck me as oddly funny. (The next day not so much.) After my selection, I managed to wander around the store for another 45 minutes trying to think of what we might need. Deodorant, milk, bread, and a frozen pizza-requested via text message from my non-celiac daughter.

Arriving home, my house was eerily quiet. It wasn't the same as I'd left it. Elisabeth was sitting by the fireplace and nobody else was around. "Where is everyone?" I queried. That was when she asked if I'd passed the firetruck or ambulance or sheriff's car on our street. I hadn't. She then proceeded to relay the story. Ethan had tipped a chair over on himself, quit breathing and was turning blue. Christina yelled for Elisabeth to call 911. (Did you know if you call 911 on your cell phone, it automatically deletes from your calls dialed list? Smart move on somebody's part.)

The entourage of medical personel arrived to assess him and gave Christina the option of having them take him to the hospital by ambulance, taking him herself, or watching him at home. He wasn't breathing for about a minute, even though the paramedic was sure it was more likely 20 seconds. I'm glad I wasn't here. That man has no idea how alert to those kinds of details Christina has. She's timed seizures, counted respirations, taken his vitals, etc. She has an idea of seconds versus minutes. But as frightened as she'd been, she decided to wait and see with him.

I asked my girls why they hadn't called me. They said they'd been a tad busy with the situation. They thought I'd come home at any minute. I can't imagine what I would have thought, driving into the cul-de-sac to find emergency vehicles at my home.

Ethan seems fine now. Christina did take him to the doctor, who told her things to watch for. I asked Ethan if the firemen had come to see him and he pointed and said "truck." Michael woke up to my post, and was stressed at not knowing what had happened. Around 8:30 a.m., a little boy crawled into my bed wanting his grandma to get up. I was happy to oblige him.

Ten Wishes For 2010

I wish for you mostly sunny days, because you love them so much.

I also wish for you enough rain to keep the grass green so you can mow, and plenty snowy, winter days for you to get out and shovel-because Ethan needs to share these experiences.

I wish for you boisterous times of joy and laughter, like seeing Ethan at Disneyland for the first time. But also times of quiet joy, as we experienced strolling along the beach with only the sound of waves crashing upon the sand.

I wish for you continued courage, strength, and wisdom as you stand as a pillar for your family to lean on in difficult times. But may you know your limits and human frailty in order to seek the one who can meet your needs according to His riches in glory.

I wish for you at least 34 more wonderful years of marriage so we can have a great celebration for our 60th anniversary-the way your mom & dad did.

I also wish for you good health, you'll be 90 when we celebrate our 60th. And I want to dance.

That means I also wish for long walks and bike rides with you. Every day.

I wish for you to have restful nights of sleep-so peaceful that you can sleep through me vacuuming at 12:30 in the morning. The way you did tonight.

But I also wish for you to not sleep so soundly that you don't hear the firetruck, ambulance, sheriff's car when they come to our home. Or sleeping through the paramedics and firemen standing inside our kitchen...all 8 of them. The way you did tonight.

I wish for you peace as you read this post in the morning while I'm still snug in our bed, while you are left to wonder what the heck happened last night.

Happy Anniversary Sweetie, and thanks for letting me sleep in this morning.

Oh, and one last wish: For your wife to never have a bad haircut or bad hair day. This will make your life oh so pleasant indeed.

The Best Birthday Ever

Today is Michael's birthday. He turned 56. I want to honor him and remind him how special he is, and how blessed I am to be married to him as I've done in years past here, and here. But as I ponder all of the wonderful qualities that make me love and cherish him so, I can't help but think of the Michael's dad, Ed.

Ed won't be here for Michael's birthday, or for Christmas. Tuesday evening he left us for the best celebration ever...a homecoming with Jesus.

Ed taught Michael the value of a dollar and how to wisely manage it to provide well for his family.

As a fighter pilot, he was determined to work hard to finish well.

He honored his parents, and was blessed for it.

His attention to details and penchat for order made him successful at so many things.

His love & care for family has left a legacy for his children and grandchildren. Thank-you Ed for passing on these wonderful virtues to your son, whom I love so very much.

Happy Birthday Michael, and know that tomorrow your dad is attending the biggest birthday party ever.

Hark!

My father-in-law was re-admitted to the hospital yesterday. While sitting in his dark room, I began to hear faint, melodic, voices down the hall. I knew it must be carolers bringing joy to those who found themselves confined so near to Christmas. The voices were rich as the sound grew closer.

As they passed by the open door their words resonated in my soul:

Hail the heaven-born Prince of Peace!
Hail the Sun of Righteousness!
Light and life to all he brings,
risen with healing in his wings.

I recognized the lyrics, yet for a moment could not remember to which song they belonged. Why was this song not part of my Christmas song list? My eyes filled with tears. He is the giver of life, the light of the world, and our healer. Why do I not hear this one played on the radio? This is the true message of Christmas.

Hark! the herald angels sing,
Glory to the new born King,

How amazing it must have been that first Christmas, for the shepherds to see the skies filled with angelic voices singing praises.

peace on earth, and mercy mild,
God and sinners reconciled!

Truth revealed. The purpose of the babe born to a virgin and laid in a manger, so we could have a relationship with the God of the universe.

Joyful, all ye nations rise,
join the triumph of the skies;
with th' angelic host proclaim,
Christ is born in Bethlehem!
Hark! the herald angels sing,
Glory to the new born King!

And for those who don't know the second stanza:

Christ, by highest heaven adored;
Christ, the everlasting Lord;
late in time behold him come,
offspring of a virgin's womb.
Veiled in flesh the Godhead see;
hail th' incarnate Deity,
pleased with us in flesh to dwell,
Jesus, our Emmanuel.
Hark! the herald angels sing,
"Glory to the new born King!"

A lot of words that can be lost in the singing. But such truth as I meditate upon them. And the last verse is my favorite:

Hail the heaven-born Prince of Peace!
Hail the Sun of Righteousness!
Light and life to all he brings,
risen with healing in his wings.
Mild he lays his glory by,
born that we no more may die,
born to raise us from the earth,
born to give us second birth.
Hark! the herald angels sing,
"Glory to the new born King!"

Christmas Trivia

Copying from Lifenut & One Thing:

1. Best childhood gift from Santa: Well, it would have to be my doll and stroller. I'm not sure why I thought they were from Santa when somehow I knew my mom had made my doll.

2. Best childhood memories: One year, we kids awoke around 4 a.m. We were sure we heard Santa outside. We snuck to the top of the stairs to have a peek. The door opened and in walked my dad. He was working a night shift and had just arrived home. We wanted to get up and open presents, but he told us to go back to bed. A few minutes later, my mom was up and my dad told us we could get up and have Christmas. I wonder if my dad got any sleep that day:?

3. Favorite Christmas cookies: Gosh, I don't think I have a favorite. Is that weird?

4. Icky Christmas memory: The year my kids had chicken pox.

5. It's not Christmas without: snow. I've come to love and adore Colorado for the variety of weather. Snow is a favorite of mine. The beauty of the white is, well cleansing.

6. Our Church Service: I really miss midnight services. Last year, we went to a midnight service at the church Christopher and Lauren were wed. It was very nostalgic for me. Our church services are at 4 & 6 p.m.

7. Christmas Pet Peeve: Oye! That I procrastinate and always get things done at the last minute?

8. Favorite Christmas CD: Oh my, just one? I own over 30 of them. I suppose it would have to be Tricia Yearwood.

9. Real or Fake: We had real forever. Well, until that year, 2006 when we went to Arizona for Christopher's graduation. When we returned, there wasn't a one left. We resorted to a fake tree from our local Walmart. And the past 3 years I've felt obligated to get our money's worth.

10. I spend Christmas Eve : Celebrating Michael's birthday. I then becoming a gift-wrapping maniac for however many hours it takes to wrap. When I'm finished, I fill stockings and hop into bed for a couple of hours before it is time to get up and put the breakfast casserole into the oven.

Anyone want to do their Top Ten Christmas Trivia?